What the Story of Esau and Jacob Teaches About Forgiving Someone Who Hurt You

I was flipping through the radio a few days ago and landed on a sermon on SiriusXM. I don't even know what station or who was preaching, I just happened to turn to it at the right moment. What I caught was the story of Jacob and Esau, two brothers, and the moment they saw each other again after years apart.

Here's the backstory in case you don't know it. Jacob cheated Esau out of his birthright. That's not a small betrayal. That's your own brother taking something that was rightfully yours, something tied to identity and inheritance and standing in the family. Then years pass. No contact, as far as we know. And then they finally cross paths again.

Esau ran to him. He ran and embraced him. After everything.

That moment moved me, because I could feel how much Esau missed his brother. The love was still there under everything that had happened between them, and I thought that was one of the most beautiful pictures of forgiveness I've ever read. It also made me think about my own brother, who I lost.

I almost didn't go see him the day before he passed. I'm so thankful I did, because the last thing we said to each other was "I love you." I had no idea that would be the last conversation. None of us know when we're down to our final five minutes with someone. That's not meant to scare you, it's meant to wake you up the way it woke me up.

So here's what I keep coming back to. Somewhere in the Bible it says God's mercy for us is new every morning. If the God who made everything can be that generous, that forgiving, that merciful toward us every single day, who are we to withhold that same grace from our brother, our sister, our mom, our dad, our friend, whoever it is that hurt us?

Here's the part that made this even clearer to me. We're not required to forgive from our own strength. You don't have to dig forgiveness out of your own limited well and hope there's enough left. You can use the forgiveness God already gives freely. Think of it like this: if you have the best glass of lemonade in the world, you don't have to make your own batch to share it with someone. You can pour from what you already have access to. Forgiveness works the same way. You can share God's forgiveness with someone even when you don't feel like you've got any of your own left to give.

I'm in a genuinely good place with forgiveness now. I haven't always been. If you're still working through it, I hope that piece helps the way it's helped me.

The Bible actually addresses the "how many times" question directly. Peter asked Jesus if he had to forgive someone as many as seven times, probably thinking that was generous. Jesus said seventy times seven. Forgiveness doesn't have a ceiling.

I know this is easier to write than to live. I'm a Cancer, and if you know anything about that sign, you know we can hold on tight. When someone hurt me in the past, I used to not let it go, period. But I've found a different way to live, and it's better. When I catch myself struggling to release something, especially with someone I have to keep interacting with, I start praying for them instead of stewing over them. My thinking shifts to: they must be going through something. Hurt people hurt people. That doesn't excuse what they did, but it takes the poison out of how I'm carrying it.

Whatever you're holding onto right now, whoever it is, whatever they did, I'm asking you to consider letting it go. Not because it was okay. Not because they deserve it. But because tomorrow isn't promised to any of us, and you deserve to be free of what you're carrying. Forgive them. Forgive yourself too, because sometimes that's the harder one. Let's embrace the peace, love, and joy that's already available to us, and pass it on to the next person.

Peace, Love and Joy always — Infinite Faith and Favor | InfiniteFaithandFavor.com